Morning Meds; 6 12 19
I saw this long rectangular sheet of what looked like slate standing on edge.
Something or someone started striking it.
Each blow broke a piece of it off.
It was struck around 5 or 6 times.
Finally there was just a short jagged piece left.
The strange part was that each time a piece broke off, I felt worse.
By the time the last piece was left, I felt awful.
I remember thinking to myself this is how I use to feel.
I am useless, lifeless, depressed and hopeless.
I am a piece of shit.
(Sorry, that’s a very ugly picture and I now know it’s untrue)
I’m not sure what my purpose in this lifetime is exactly, but I do know that one of the things I need to do in this passage, is to overcome self hate.
I’ve come a long way in the last few years.
I am very blessed.
It didn’t take to long, while meditating to get the meaning of the dream.
I had been asking for confirmation about some of the things I now experience often.
Are they real or what?
The feeling that it’s to good to be true.
How is this even possible?
It was like I was reminded of how awful I used to feel so I could compare it to now.
It was a call to gratitude.
Yes it’s real, you are and always have been completely loved.
You are one with the creator of all.
Can’t get much better than that.
Sometimes we have to be reminded of the past to appreciate the now.
(Three years later, what is to good to be true, continues to be true.)